I’m a planner. This isn’t exactly news to anyone who knows me relatively well, but sometimes even I manage to surprise myself with my overwhelming desire to plot out my day by individual hours and activities.
As with most people, work takes precedence on the average day. For one of my jobs, I need to physically show up and be at the place of work for a certain time period. For the other, I put in writing hours from home. After that, the time is truly mine and I’m free to enjoy it how I please.
On most days, however, I try to slot out my free time in a way that strikes the perfect balance between all of those things:
Cleaning after myself, running errands, and doing the kind of basic things that daily living requires. Walking, running, swimming or doing other athletic things that will help me lose the pesky fifteen pounds I’ve picked up from nearly ten months of working at a sedantary job, not scheduling in regular exercise, and stress-eating. Talking to my boyfriend during the moments that we are both awake despite the time difference. Filling out forms and searching the internet to prepare for some changes in the upcoming year. Actually pushing myself to be social and see other people in fun-type settings (rarely, though – who am I kidding?). Applying for scholarships. Reading ‘this much’ of my books each day so that I can fit ‘this many’ books into my month. Watching a certain amount of Netflix so that I can finish the series in ‘this many’ days and fit ‘this many’ movies into my week. (What is ‘this many’, you ask? An arbitrary number that I decide is impressive.) Finding the time to blog no less frequently than every two days and write for myself every once in a while. Keeping myself educated on the state of the world. Spending time in nature.
I sometimes wonder if I’d fit ‘having fun’ into the schedule if I could. Oh, wait…
I am not entirely sure why I need to do this, but I guess it helps me feel like I’m on track with my life. I know I shouldn’t feel really bad on days when I get so caught up in reading The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo that I do not have time to run or on days when I thought that I had a really good idea for a blog post and just end up staring blankly at my computer screen for an hour, but… I still kind of do. I feel as though I should be doing something productive at every moment of the day and am not so good at going easy on myself when I don’t.
So does anyone struggle with this?